I See Them Everywhere

Recently a friend bought a new car.  Suddenly, I am noticing that “his” car (Make, model, and color) is everywhere!  This always seems to happen, and I have always wondered why this is true.  

I decided to check it out.  Scientifically, this is called the “Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon”. Wikipedia states that:

“Frequency illusion, also known as the Baader–Meinhof phenomenon, is a cognitive bias in which, after noticing something for the first time, there is a tendency to notice it more often, leading someone to believe that it has a high frequency (a form of selection bias).”

This definition reminds me that simple answers do not exist. Throughout the last few months, I have been discovering that much of our life is ruled by our biases.  We need to pay attention to the reasons we make some of our decisions. Allowing our internal map (world-view) to be the exclusive source of choice will blind us to opportunities for change and for love.

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thessalonians 5:11

I know.  You are wondering what this specific Bible verse has to do with Frequency Illusion.

I am pointing this concept toward our relationships with others.  If we are being reminded to build each other up, it is valuable to have a concept of the needs of others.  If our brains are wired to be attentive, we will notice these needs frequently, by definition.

In Tim Ferriss' book, Tribe of Mentors, Esther Perel is quoted saying:

"Life will present you with unexpected opportunities, and you won't always know in advance which are the important moments. Above all, it's the quality of your relationships that will determine the quality of your life. Invest in your connections, even those that seem inconsequential."

Normally, I would continue to write and expound on my personal theories and opinions which are, of course, so unbelievably valuable to each of you.  Perhaps due to that statement, I should turn off the comment section for the near future.  

Today, I am just going to lay down a few stories written by contemporary people as to why the concept of seeing the need is so critical.  I sincerely hope that you spend some time with each short article.

I pray that we learn to see the needs of others in our own pain.

A Learning a Day - Wishing Us Bad Luck (High School Commencement Address by John Roberts, US Supreme Court)

I pray that we learn to see active possibilities for comforting others in our past failures. 

A Learning a Day – Failures of Kindness (George Saunders’ commencement speech at Syracuse University in 2013)

I pray that we learn to see how celebration encourages everyone.

"What it looks like from @Space_Station when your best friend achieves her lifelong dream to go to space."