Starting Point

It begins with, 

• A bang. The pistol has been fired. The runners leave the blocks. The race is on.
• The scraping of metal on dirt. Earth is flung aside revealing a hole. Construction has begun.
• A key is turned (or a button pushed if you’ve got a newer vehicle). The engine turns over and the vacation begins.

Each small action triggers something new. We call them starting points. They are the first thing that turns a goal into reality. They begin a journey that eventually takes us to a finish line, an education, or a new home.

I’ve been getting stuck on that term, lately. More precisely, I’m getting stuck on the timeline for the entire process. 

Understanding that a point-in-time physical action creates momentum to move toward a goal, it seems difficult for me to discard the origin of an idea, the diligent research, and the painstaking preparation that precedes those actions as irrelevant to the phrase ‘starting point’. 

Splitting hairs, they used to call this confusion. But combining 'starting' with 'point' is bothering me.

Several actions take place before the starting pistol is fired. First, there is a dream of something better. Frequently, the thought goes no further, there are no actions, and thus no starting point. 

But sometimes, a constant undercurrent refuses to disavow the dream. Small actions are then prescribed to find a path toward this vision. The starting point might be the first time you bring the aspiration out of its vaporous homestead into reality with a Google search. 

Perhaps I’ll just admit to being perplexed for now and move on. The term itself is not today's issue anyway. From the first spark to the resolution, the process is my target. And today’s example might not include a key, gun, or shovel.

Two people are in the same room while angst drips from the air. 

Not wanting to be first, no one speaks. 

Not wanting to be present, no exit is found. 

An unattainable wisp of reconciliation finds internally reinstated 

‘What-ifs’ interspersed with flashing interjections of 

betrayal and painful memory.  

Although each dreams of harmony between them, the catalyst of peace is determined by just one. 

I recently heard good advice for that 'one'. I was told that the opening dialogue is easier to introduce when first discussing points of agreement. Encouraging conversation is best attained when asking questions that affirm sameness. 

I made an exercise out of this challenge and ideas began to quickly take shape. Some are listed below. A conversation could be started by turning each into a ‘do you agree’ question.

• Eating healthy and exercising is good for us.
• Walking on a sunny 72-degree day with a nice breeze is enjoyable.
• A child’s laughter is pleasantly contagious.
• Our senses can bring us back to fondly remembered events.
• Clean air is better than dirty air.
• We should leave the campsite better than we found it.
• Picking up after yourself is better than expecting others to clean up the mess.
• Most parents want the lives of their children to be better than theirs.
• We all want freedom and choice.
• Married people should not cheat on each other.
• Most people want to be good people.
• We all want our children to be safe.
• We all want to be accepted.
• Puppies are cute, even if you don’t like dogs
• Kittens are cute, even if you don’t like cats. (I might not use this one)
• We all crave understanding.
• We all want to be loved. 

There are thousands of available statements. Whatever the cause of division, we can find things of common accord. We only need to narrow down the list depending on the situation. 

The two uncomfortable people in our example might find that the non-confrontational questions allow the air to be cleared of the intense pressure while the need for an exit dissipates. For this moment, it might not matter if anything is resolved. The significance of this respite is found in a smile that showed up brightly, a burst of laughter that was shared, and the momentary release of pain which created a crack in the defensiveness of each.

Then, where exactly was the starting point? 

Today's discovery confesses a truth. The 'point' isn't the point. What counts is the 'starting'.

As much as possible, and to the extent of your ability, live in peace with everyone. Romans 12;18