Your Emails are Rude

So. It happened.

“Enough already! You need to respond”, my mind speaks loudly between my ears. 

I am a good listener, and I am tuned in and listening now!

• The first email asked a question.
• The response offered my answer.
• The email in question refuted my reply in, let’s just say, no uncertain terms.

"Then why ask the question in the first place?" my inner voice screeched. I did not reply to the email in question. If I am going to escalate, I’m going to do it with actual words. And so, it happened.

In the same way (no uncertain terms) I voiced my irritation not only with the current crises but also with the inclusion of all that came before. Yes, I had stacked up a good number of offenses in the ‘Let it go’ category but as it turns out, that location has a sub-category called ‘But do not forget’.

It was a difficult conversation but amicably resolved with promises on both sides to do better. 

“Civility fades in the face of entitlement.”

Shortly afterward, I read this quote from Seth Godin. I began to question how I handled the above situation. As you are no doubt aware, it is always fun to second-guess yourself. Well, maybe not.

I recalled a time when I thought that moving to Costa Rica would be a good idea. I spent a great deal of time planning for this.  It’s a beautiful country, it’s more relaxed, the town squares are lined with carts selling healthy foods (I mean, red peppers are huge!), and life seemed to be more cordial and welcoming.

People always asked me why I thought that I would do this. The short answer would inform them that I wished to get away from the entitled people. But I had never defined my reasoning as well as that short sentence above. 

And here’s my, "Mea culpa". The above conversation began with a feeling of entitlement. I apparently felt that I was entitled to more respect than I thought I had been given. The why of this premise is a long story and not worth the effort. Let’s just say that I might have wasted a lot of money moving to a foreign country only to discover that my avoidance theory was illusionary. It is now clear that I would have taken entitlement with me.

There’s something in me that rejects entitlement, though. Yes, even while feeling entitled, I disdain the concept. Until I recognized it as the root of my noted conversation, I truly had no idea it was there, and I was left baffled and confused in my ignorance. But the conversation and subsequent realization will now lead to corrections.

I have been told that God is good and provides for me. I have listened to countless sermons and songs that reminded me that if God takes care of the lilies of the field, he certainly takes care of me. I have acknowledged that we will all have trouble in this world, but that Emmanual lives in us through the Holy Spirit.  

And, all my life, I’ve heard about Grace. 

Belief in all of this (and more) should have eliminated this whole thing called entitlement. I didn’t choose the place of my birth. I didn’t choose my parents. I didn’t create the opportunities, the education, or the friendships and connections that have brought me to this place. These were gifts of grace. I earned none of this. So, how is it that I can demand ownership of my self-inflated importance?

We live in a country that espouses rights of all kinds. We demand,

• To be respected. 
• To voice our concerns.
• To live freely without boundaries.
• To bear arms.
• To have choices.
• To have full grocery shelves.
• To have cheap gas for our cars.
• To . . . well, fill in your own. There’s much to choose from.

It can be excused that we have become convinced that we are owed certain things in life. But excuses take us only so far. 

Eventually, I hope we can see that the gifts we’ve been given are not things that make us superior to others. Someday, I hope that we can see that the grace we have been given is not to be hoarded but to be shared. I pray that perhaps, one of these days, we can treat each other as we have been taught.

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.
    And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
    and to walk humbly with your God.

Micah 6:8