Seductive Red Dots

This week, I noticed that I am controlled by my phone. It probably doesn't happen to you, of course, but I feel compelled to look at this pocket-sized life interrupter too many times a day. I started wondering why.

First, let me say that I'm not going to embark on a message seeking to destroy your device because it's evil. I can't imagine the inconvenience of life without it, even having lived through a time when nobody knew what a cell phone was. 

I considered that being subject to FOMO (the fear of missing out) is not a huge factor. I also considered that I could be erroneously self-analyzing.

There was a time when we continually checked for emails and text messages. Today, it is not necessary to seek out these messages. The messages now relentlessly seek us.

Most of these notifications are designed to ding, ping, ring, and sing.  But should someone decide that sound is too intrusive and proceeds to turn off the device's music of life, there is still a visible attention magnet - that annoying RED DOT. 

Our apps will gleefully inform us that we are in dangerous territory – our device holds neglected messages. Answer the dot or beware of the consequences.

I should, but I won't, go into push messages. Lions and tigers and bears, Oh My!

Our phones have a mysterious power over us. It's been proven that our devices have diminished the quality of in-person interactions. Want proof?

Personal Story:

Years ago, I was driving on McKnight Road (near 3M Headquarters). Including myself, there were 4 people in the car. Three of them were on their cell phones for the entire travel time. Eventually, I joined too. I truly had nothing to say but I thought it would look cool to the driver next to me to see all of us on individual calls.

Our phones have a mysterious power over us. Our attention span is also diminishing significantly.

Personal Story.

Occasionally I will pick up my device for a particular purpose. Maybe it was just to see what the temperature was, or how much snow was falling at my daughter's house. 

Password accepted and the phone opens. I see red dots - all over the place. I opened several apps to see what might be happening and after 10 minutes closed the phone. Kicking myself, I realized that I never did check the weather!

Those red dots can prove to be our undoing. They casually but effectively suggest that their existence is more important than the people right in front of us. The demand of the red dot seeks to usurp the totality of a most important resource; Time.

Personal Stories.

The Story of my mother's prime pet peeve. 

This one is short. If we were at the table having coffee, we had best NOT be on the phone. It would be a very good thing to turn off all notifications. Even better, shut the phone off. If she didn't say something about it at the time, it is guaranteed that my mother would eventually inform in a most offended manner.

The Story of Daughter's Day

As a real estate broker, I was pretty much always on call. Because of this, I felt it important that a significant expense was incurred to have a phone installed in my car. (It's the way we had to do it back then - hardwired just like the one in the house.)

Because time with my kid was often interrupted, I had decided that one year on a self-proclaimed daughter's day (that's a cute story), we were going to spend the day together. Starting the car, the loud sound indicator began to shrill that the car phone was now on. I looked at the phone, picked up the receiver, and pushed the off button.

I'll never forget the look on the face of this child as she realized today would be time together - no interruptions allowed.

As it turns out, "If you spend time on someone, they can tell." (Seth Godin)

"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is." Ephesians 5:15-17 ESV