A Simple Faucet

For some reason, I seem to be chastising myself when it comes to “simple things”.  Today, that means washing hands and rinsing dishes.

Fortunate to live in a country where obtaining potable water does not involve a 3-mile walk with a 50-pound container on my head, I have only to pull a shiny, chrome-finished handle.  In the blink of an eye, I am gifted with as much temperature-controlled water as I wish.

Perhaps I am thinking about this more while seeing drought affecting our western states.  I suppose that happens when problems hit closer to home.  Knowing that a billion people in our world are making that 3-mile walk has apparently not made the impact that it should be making.  Shameful.

It is a blessing that aqua deprivation is completely absent from conscious thought.  And this, of course, is the basis for my personal critique as I write these words.

When washing my hands, I have noticed that I begin by opening the spigot at a near-to-scalding full throttle.  While this precious resource gushes into the sink, I apply liquid soap, wash my hands and then start rinsing.  For most of this exercise, the flow of clean water swirls around its inevitable destination unused and wasted.

When washing dishes, again I find that temperature is hot and the water streams full blast while I apply a soap-filled sponge to scrub the vessels and then rinse.

As I have now become cognizant of my incredible status quo of wastefulness, I have begun to make behavioral changes to minimize the waste of liquid gold.

• It sounds easy.  I am getting in the habit of making sure that the handle is in the furthest right position before I turn it off.  This will prevent the waste of heated water next time and it also makes me stop and think for a moment – probably just for a while as the muscle-memory has been disrupted.
• It sounds easy.  I am remembering to pull the handle intentionally making certain that only the required volume is in play instead of mindlessly yanking the thing nearly out of its base.
• It sounds easy.  It is NOT easy.

It takes concentration, awareness, and intentionality.  The good news indicates that I am learning. Even a little bit of conservation every day is well, worth it.

This behavior modification has also triggered additional accusations that speak loudly, "Hey, think about what you are doing!’  

I am now seeking to conserve in other areas as well by combining errand trips, recycling, eliminating plastic bags, and well, all of those ‘little’ things they (without being defined) tell us will make a difference.

Photo Credit: Sassey Photographer on VisualHun.com

I am not done yet. Noticing the ill effects created by my habits regarding the flow of temperature-controlled water brings me to another place needing my attention.  (Is there no end, God?!!)

You may remember that I have entered a period of relationship reconciliation.  This has been an ‘expected / not expected’ experience. 

I say “expected” to indicate that I knew difficult discussions would be forthcoming but achievable as I only anticipated positive results.  I now discover that these "results" were already personally biased.  For one thing, I thought I knew who would reconcile and who would not.

The term “not expected” – well, to expound further would only be redundant.  

You might be asking what I have noticed within the scope of reconciling with others.  Let me just mention a few but concentrate on one.

• It is more difficult than one might think to create a safe space for difficult discussions.
• It is impossible to predict how anyone will react when confronted with issues, be they true and valid moments of physical or mental harm or merely have the same effect being more imagined than factual.
• It is erroneous to expect, well – anything.
• It is a fallacy that some things can be repaired quickly.  It will take time and some issues might never be adequately resolved.
• It is surprising how quickly a conversation can move from calm, rational dialogue to challenged anger, defensiveness, followed by escalation that becomes (or at least encourages) a complete breakdown.

 That last one.

That one has become my faucet.  And this faucet is without a doubt, not simple.

I have discovered that if I am involved in any reveal-apology-forgive situation, I had best prepare my faucet by fixing the handle to the right keeping the eventual flow cool and calm.  Applying pressure to release the flow had best be intentional without ‘mindlessly yanking the thing out of its base”.

If either of these ‘best practices’ are not employed, a scalding hot rushing flow of water/words will disintegrate any ability to move forward as it washes everything down a drain of more-harm-than-good.

 

Work remains.