For the Birds, or perhaps, Paper Towels from Heaven

I will provide a fair warning before we begin. This is an article that begs, "I don’t know what’s wrong with you, Mike.” 

Last week, I was late for work.  When leaving home, I discovered my car needed attention before I could go anywhere.  You might be thinking, given the season, the issue might be brushing snow off the car or scraping ice-covered windows, or even letting the car warm up so the defrosters work.

It was a 45-degree morning. None of those examples apply.



On occasion, I will find a bird dropping or two on the vehicle. Today, that would have been nice.  It seems that the tree under which my car was parked had become, I'm just going to name it here, a bird hospital. Today a bird (or 10) had developed the aviary version of diarrhea.

Had a hose been available, I would have easily taken care of the problem. I did not have a hose.

Had the door itself been free of this substance, I would have driven to the local car wash. The door was not free of this substance.

But I DID have paper towels.  These had just been purchased the weekend before this outdoor ER event.  I was SO grateful for paper towels - lots and lots of paper towels.

I was able to clean the door well enough to begin the drive to work.  It was, I admit, a bit embarrassing as I drove into the parking lot in my new poop-mobile.  The saving grace?  The weather report said rain beginning at noon for the rest of the day.  I might not be required to get-this-car-out-of-the-lot-before-someone-sees-you at the end of the day.

Observations for today are listed below.

• I spent a little time searching Google for images since I didn’t take any of my own. I discovered that my incident was minor compared to others. I then decided images were not required for this post. You are very welcome.
• I thought of what may have happened had I left the house a few minutes earlier. Perhaps a full-on personal shower might have been required. I did not search Google for these examples.
• I considered the good fortune resulting from my very timely solution-purchase!
• I used the story at work. This seemed to lighten the day for a few colleagues. We all suffer from a laugh-at-your-own-expense relationship.
• I acknowledged a lesson learned:  When things get a little crappy, God is there giving us paper towels and the opportunity to continue our work.  

Most often, I try to combine these offerings with scripture; I searched for Bible references about this phenomenon expecting none. Surprise!

The Book of Tobias talks about Tobit who was required to sleep outdoors after burying a murdered man. In the Ancient Near East, this makes a person unclean.  The story tells us that sparrow droppings from above his resting place fell on his eyes producing blindness. He was eventually cured but I’ll let you read this story on your own if you choose.  I’m giving myself the same out.

One of these days, I’ll read this book out of some curiosity but for today, I am just going to stick with my original thought.  Thank you for the gift of heavenly paper towels.