I Didn’t Know, a Confession, and a Way Forward

I have been around the block a few times and I spent much of my life thinking, “Things are getting better. People are getting better.” But I didn’t know.

I Didn't Know

Washing Our Hands

Over the past few years, we’ve once again learned that washing our hands is a good thing, speaking hygienically, of course.

But what caught my attention was another common phrase created by adding the words, "Of it."

"Washing our hands of it," got me thinking.  I wondered how often I might not say those words but might act on the statement itself. I began to consider that underneath daily thoughts and actions, perhaps I make decisions based on that cliché’ without realizing it.

Food for thought revealed that these five words probably correlate directly to, “There is nothing more I can do.” This sentence we hear often.

Impactful Stories 1 - Stay on the Bus

I am still working through the “Power” series. It was my goal to publish the second article this morning. Although I’m taking the easy road today, you’re not off the hook.

Graduation season is upon us, and the associated speeches will be quoted by many in the coming months and years.  I wrote about one of these speeches in 2017 with “Airborne Mortar Boards”.  

Only one of the following stories was spoken as advice to graduates. But I believe that as we travel our own paths, we are continually graduating. We learn, evaluate, consider, decide, and improve (or not). Our life's trajectory serves to make these two stories forever appropriate.

I will make no comment on the words chosen by the speakers. I will leave it to you entirely. That’s me being lazy. I have every confidence you'll see something of personal value by the time you're finished.

Harp vs Harping

I remember, well at least I think I do, a story about a harp.  Two of my relatives were in some topic-unknown discussion.  One was asked something in the order of, “What is it you want from me?” The reply was a little bit weird, and completely outside the realm of what any sane person would do.  

“I want a harp playing on my doorstep.”  Again, the disclaimer states; exact phrase unknown.

Given the fact that these were MY relatives, the saneness condition no longer applies. Low and behold, a harp was playing on the doorstep within days. There were no angels harmed in this story to the best of my knowledge.  

Well, we know what a harp is.  It’s a six-foot-tall stringed musical instrument that weighs about 80 pounds.  To move one of these things is no easy task, but I have been told that a crane is not required.  To this day, I have no idea what the procurement cost was for this ‘special request’, nor do I know what melody was offered. 

I start with this story because harping could mean playing the harp but, in this article, the two have nothing to do with each other.

Harping, for today’s purpose, is described by Dictionary.com as, ‘Dwell on, talk or write persistently and tediously on a particular topic.”  The etymology is derived from playing the same note repeatedly, as in "to harp on the same string".  

Just my two cents; it seems to me that "bass-on" would be more appropriate, but perhaps that just my familiarity with a bass (the choir reference) combined with my ignorance of the instrument called a harp.

The prologue being complete, here's where I am going. You see, I have looked back over several months of posts and found a few similar and recurring themes.  

• Relationships are critical for life with Christ and with each other.
• Self-sacrificial love is critical for life with Christ and with each other.
• Forgiveness is critical for life with Christ and with each other.
• But we live in a divided world, country, and culture.
• But we create our own walls and then dig ourselves in to create silos of commonality with little chance to interact with differences.  
• But we choose to surround ourselves with agreement-only friends thus failing to learn about, to understand, and even to love others.

I not crazy about the reputation for harping on, but I am afraid I have been well, harping on.

Admission requires the ‘what now’ question.  Let me discern publicly.  

I have determined that relationships (that's really what all those points above point to) are very difficult.  Let me repeat, very difficult.

• We all carry baggage in the form of bias.  But we firmly deny the possibility that there could be ‘things’ guiding our emotions, actions, and decisions of which we are unaware.  It makes us feel out of control.  We are taught to be in control of everything - always.
• We all carry baggage in the form of experience.  You know little of my experiences and I know little about yours.  We can’t know.  We can hardly know how our own experiences shape us let alone how others have been shaped. 
• We all carry fear in our hearts.  This is often hidden because in this society, being afraid translates directly into weakness.  We’re constantly told to be strong so our vulnerabilities must remain buried.
• We all carry an aversion to rejection. We want to be accepted and loved for who we are. But  frequently we will stop short of leaving our comfortable tribe to explore the camps of others.  We live in a society where our own comfort is considered a right.  It seems completely illogical that we would purposefully leave this zone for something that might prove to be intimidating. We will not pursue that which might create awkwardness. We will repudiate that which could expose our ignorance of different cultures, political views, or well, you fill in the blank. 

It is certainly possible that this shortlist is only the starting point in a quest to determine why relationship-building is difficult. I could also, from personal experience, provide a litany of attempts made to foster relationships that have crashed and burned.  

I guess that was the reason for today's letter. Between the failures and the ‘harping thing’, I often feel that I should just move on.  Enough already.  It is almost – no, it is absolutely despair.

That won't do.  We are encouraged to recognize that we can't change everything.  We will agree that we can't change everybody.  It is probably true that we can't change anybody. (God can, but that's a different article.)

But we are not allowed to give up.  We are not allowed to quit.

In that light, I have made my decision.  I will continue to "harp on" the idea of reconciled relationships.  The way through despair is action.  However, I do promise that I will concentrate a little more on variety. We good?

I firmly believe that this difficult subject is critical for life in Christ and life with each other.  There are verses all over the Bible that talk about it. Below are a few that I found; you will know of others. 

• 1 Peter 4:8
• 2 Peter 1:5-7
• Matthew 7:12
• 1 Thessalonians 3:12
• Psalms 27:17
• John 15:13
• John 13:34
• Ecclesiastes 7:8-9
• Ephesians 4:23
• James 1:19-20
• Hebrews 10:24-25

Meanwhile, 

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.”   Matthew 6:19

You see, in the end, Christ died for all.  He created a family that includes all, even those we dislike.  Yes, while painfully clear this relationship-building process is difficult for everyone, let us recognize that moving toward this goal is one way in which we store up treasures in heaven.  Let us recognize that each person on earth is a treasure made by God. Our only job is to acknowledge this. 

An added benefit creates peace and harmony here on earth. And, for those of you questioning, "No, I am not an angel, and I am certainly not running for Miss Universe."

Hole in One

The Hole in One.

Primarily, this is a golf term.  But we use this phrase (or forms of it) for other purposes as well.

In the game of golf, this phrase means that you’re have been able to place a ball with a diameter of 1.68-inches into a 4.25-inch-wide hole located about 700 feet from the tee using a 44-inch-long stick - with only one shot.  That is one amazing feat!  (Sorry. I just liked the feet/feat thing.)

In life, it means you’ve ‘nailed it’ the very first time.  You’re an “Ace” - please take a bow.

I haven’t played golf for quite some time now (a little bit sad, but it’s just too dang hot!) but just like you, I have played at "life" every single day.

I have never accomplished the “hole in one” while playing a game of golf.  However, I have achieved more than a few “eagles” which, for scoring purposes, are ‘like’ the hole in one – just without the one part.